So here we are again approaching another Christmas.  The holidays and Christmas especially are intended to bring families closer together and thereby seal scenarios that will translate into traditions for years to come.  Holidays also bring out that unhappy family member who hates the world and all in it; the eternal scrooges who detest joy.  They come and each year everyone tips on eggshells to avoid an encounter with them.  Out of love for family, they are always welcome and some good nature family member tries to play the peacekeeper to avoid a loose cannon in the room.

Its sad but many Christmas festivities are nearly ruined by these individuals.  They are family and they cannot be ignored, at least not by those who love and value their family.  The greatest advice here is to embrace the person; shower them with loving kindness.  After all the holiday is just one day; how much harm can they really cause? Really?

Tolerance is also love.  To love is to be tolerant of others.  To look at the situation from their perspective and the only way to know their perspective is to be tolerant enough to listen and not judge.  So you love me is what one must think and smile.

2011; Anew New Year

            Another year has come and gone. Gosh, it seems only yesterday. Before going any further, may you have a productive and prosperous year! Many will plan resolutions to be challenged in 2011.  Some will want to lose weight, some will want to get their finances in balance, others will want to forgive and be forgiven of the past and take steps to do just that and still others will search themselves for answers to their ills and misfortunes.  It is to this last group that this article is addressed.

            Ever wondered why misfortunes and ills seem to follow like a little black cloud above your head.  Nothing seems to go right, no matter how great your intentions.  The dime store answer to this perplexing wonder is there’ll be bad times but they don’t always last.  And again that is the dime store answer. The million dollar answer to this wonder is such experiences are caused by a mind defiled by negativeness.

            Think about it for a moment. Being human means living with a double edged sword of life.  On the one edge, life is experienced internally through thoughts and emotions, while on the other edge; the life experience is external through physical sensations and environmental influences. These two experiences feed one another.  Eventually over time, specific patterns develop whereby the thoughts control the behavior as a reaction to some external stimulus.  This is the cause for the “rut” in which one finds their life.  A life that has not experienced many external rewards becomes conditioned to expect the negatives.  It is programmed to not only expect the negatives but the reaction is to accept the negatives as general principles.

            Allow this year to truly be new by reconditioning the thoughts and emotions.  Instead of running away from the negativeness of life; face it. Face the reality as it is, while at the same time observing your reactions. Many people cannot renew their lives because they have been too long absent from observing it.  They have grown accustomed to observation in the past tense rather than observing the moment. They are stuck in a type of mental automation which removes the captain from her/his seat.

            Self observation shows the reality internally and externally.  Do not be the person who only looks outward for the cause of her/his calamities. The cause of all negativeness lies within.  Be persistent in observing your reactions, change routes/designs to resolutions.  Eventually you will develop new patterns and the mind will become free and once more filled with possibilities.  A free mind is a mind more capable of loving and being loved because it is filled with the joy of new successes and rewards.

Let’s Restore Love in 2011.

              

Restore Love by Speaking Out...

  

This moment, this writing is dedicated to all the children suffering, and will suffer, at the hands of those who are supposed to shower them with love. Adults passing down a tradition of lack of love and abuse themselves to the little ones in their care. Following are some of the reports of abuse repeated here as reminder of a confounded world that continues to evolve:

    

     An aunt burns a child’s toenail with scalding water after beating the child’s toes with a hammer. The aunt said the child would not stop asking for food and there was no food to give her. Imagine the innocent little one, experiencing gnawing hunger then she seeks solace in the only person she knows; only to be beaten with a hammer then scalded.  Can you really imagine?!

A child dies of asphyxiation.  Looking further, the report pointed out that the child’s mother fell asleep and the child, who slept with its mother, suffocated under the weight of the mother.  The mother had been drinking alcohol.  This was the third child that died in the woman’s home in the same fashion.  Children born seemingly to be sacrificed at the hand of their parents, and for what – the love of liquor, drugs, and / or idolization of another person?

A father slaps his son so hard; the three year old child loses two front teeth and does not gain consciousness after being knocked to the floor. The father states “He was talking back.”  He was talking back, he was talking back, he was talking back, back…

 The most incredible piece of news was the fact that all the children were younger than five years old. “What hatred and cruelty”, one officer, at one of the arrest scenes was quoted. This madness is beyond cruelty.  Children under the age of five; innocent, innocuous, and guiltless exposed to such madness by those who are supposed to shower them with love.

History tells of concentration camps and a nation given over to the curious exploratory physical experiments conducted by mad scientists, of nations crippled of mind and will through slavery, controlled by mad masters. Today we read of enemies linked by lineage

without obligation, without responsibility, and without love.

How horrible is this!? – Let’s Restore Love by speaking out against abusive behavior.

Measured Value

Our relationships are vital and precious. There is the adage, that no man is an island. With levels of truth to this statement, we should handle our relationships with great care; treasure them.

In the turmoil of todays' relationships, we actually see brothers against brothers, husbands against wives, fathers and mothers against sons and daughters, friends against one another. It does not have to be this way; no, not if you take steps to love one another.

Love must be learned -just as any other concept- as part of our cognitive decvelopment. We must practice the concepts of what it means to love, and to be loved. The evolution of our relationships depend on learning the concepts of loving and being loved. We cannot place our relationshps on automatic drive and expect value of them. We must be pro-active in developing that value. Is it not said that what we put in is what we gain from our efforts? Moreover, Jesus, the most profound man of history pointed out, "...the measure you use, will be measured to you..." (NIV Luke 6:38 and Mark 4:24).

At times, in any given relationship you are involved in, you will find that you move in opposite directions from the other person/s in the relationship. If no one makes the attempt to bridge these disconnects; you drift even further apart in the other direction.

To establish a bridge and reconnect can be as simple as a good night kiss to the forehead of your son or daughter, a touch to the cheek of your significant other as they leave the house, a phone call to a friend to say, "I miss you", a card, a letter, and if you're new or rather rusty at all this, send a text message to say "Hi". Any small effort will do; in this case, a little goes a long way. Start today to avoid becoming an island.

Dance, He Gives His Heart Freely

Dance, He Gives His Heart Freely
by MJCrusin

When he gives his heart so freely
from the balcony so high
Tired of the aloneness
Correlation with one whose
nigh
to
validate him
complete him
stamp his manhood
The ultimate test of his abilities to
do
have
keep
hold
know
respect
appreciate
enjoy
laugh
love
Tailored uniquely, just for him
and this is only when he gives his heart so freely.
he recognizes her
among the throng of masqueraders
dancing below him
before him
glistening
a sparkle
his eyes dazed
mind dazzled
heart stops
grinning
smiling, alpha attention.
Beyond Cupid
he recognizes desire
to catch the illumination
dancing before him
above the throngs of
masqueraders
and this only when he gives his heart
so freely.
No matter what he must do
equip to answer the call
of one crying out to him
she cries
honesty
happiness
joy
you
we
respect
protect
speak
comprehend
compassion
love
None between us
no matter the cause
I call you now
hear me
hold me
love me
tailored uniquely, just for
you
design exclusive
where are you?
breathless she calls.
Listening, frozen
he watches
she dances
without a masque
among the throng of masqueraders
radiant,
before him
dancing
wind whispers echoes of her cries
his ears capture only her
sound
among the throng of masqueraders
his heart
so long without one near
his mouth he speaks
Babylove, my dear
I kept my watch
knowing you were here
dancing among the throng of masqueraders
the distance
a life’s journey
mere seconds
to place your hand in mine.
But, this is only when a man gives his
heart so freely.
Dance, dance, dance, dance
cry for you are heard
whisper your desire
upon his ears
release your
heart on whispering winds
that kisses his ears
that you are here
that you are near
nigh
beneath his window
beyond the balcony
among the throng of masqueraders
dance ,dance, dance
for to you
he will give
his heart to
so freely.
Dance.

Move Toward / Embrace

Have you taken note of today's great visual artists?  A new era in art has risen and a few of today's artists have surpassed the Masters.  Check out the works of ( Seventh International Sand Sculpture Festival). Those sculpted works at the festival can act as reminders that we shape our world into whatever we want it to be. Not only our physical world ,as the artist does in the sand; but aspects of our other worlds, especially, the paradigm we call love.  Sculpting our way to joy.

What is meant here is this: Examine the value of your life and your relationship/s with open eyes;  assess this value carefully for it leads to joy and what many term happiness. Who can say, I am where I want to be? I am where I want to be in terms of my relationships and all other aspects of my life. In the assessment, are you comfortable?  Are you content? Are you secure in the fact that someone loves you back? What last did you do to reinforce this comfort? When last did you wink at an issue instead of exploding? Why are your dreams only dreams? Why are all your relationships empty?  Create a stage where the two of you can be audience to each other.  Can you see?

Some still chase seminar gurus who encourage taking risks. Risk taking is more suitable to desperate people who have a concept that it is noble to -and the spoils taste better if they -take a risk.  Think about it.
Risk; a gamble , a chance, a danger, probability, hazard, lay on the line, put on the line, expose to loss or damage.
In other words the possibility of a win based on hope for a favorable outcome.  There is no need to take risks when changing your conditions; the order is there and you will carry out/accomplish what is in your heart to do. If you have a significant other, develop and create with that person. State the goals for your relationship. Why do you want a relationship in the first place?  Create that. Establish a system to keep each other actively involved. Discuss and correct aversive behavior if discovered.

You will find - in changing conditions, you create the life and love you want.
On the other hand, if your heart is not in agreement with your aim, you get quantity versus
quality and sometimes ,depending on the risks, you get nothing and end up stuck
 in the sands of life hoping for a re-creation.  Control your condition and change your life.

Express What You Feel

Its not always that humans say what they intend to say to each other.
Some write their mental scripts of what they will say to the other person

when the opportunity presents itself.  They find when they are face to face 
with the person, all they wanted to say becomes a phantasm.
How can this be? Especially with family and friends, those we say we love
and cherish, those who consider our relationship with them of much value.

How can this be?  You care, but you cannot express yourself openly and
honestly? What a shame, and still, how can this be? 


Expressing what one feels should be the simplest exercise, however, the
inability to express what one is feeling is a most difficult task- reason 
being-  failure to express feelings is the result of being far removed internally
from the character one presents to the world. Some characterizes it 
as living a lie.  This is the source of all drama in relationships:
trying to maintain an external persona that is not a copy

of one's internal image.  Fear is the culprit behind such false external images.
Some say its just a game humans play.  This subect of fear is
for futher discussion another day. 
 So how does one handle self expression?


 Poets and song writers have an uncanny way of observing and scribing
 human emotions.  Often, they express what others cannot say or refuse to say.
 The following example is from a song.

Courtesy of Rocky/ Quantum Band / Atlanta, Ga./1994

"You know that I love you,
that I love you, but distance is in
between us, I can't forget your
face and your picture is my
saviour, I'm coming to get you.
----------------------
Ask, what do I want/need  to discuss with someone else?
Must I seek clarity by having others elaborate what they are saying to me?
What are some difficulties that we must deal with? Verbalize them.
Do we need to look at the matter from different perspectives?
What ever one must do to express emotions and thoughts, then do!




 Think for a moment the last time you had something to say and

could not, would not say it. What stopped you?  Your emotions surfaced but then
they were suppressed;  why?  You be the difference in your relationships
by being open, honest and truthful to self and others. Share with others the
character inside, not the "broken" one you resolved to be externally.
This act eliminates false characters. It also fills you with courage, allowing
you to embrace your emotions.If you need a guide to aid in expressing
what you feel, then, listen to some music or read poetry, get yourself back on track
and express yourself; you'll be glad you did.